The white parent is better than you. To find out why (and read this post), please visit our new site: BestWhiteParentEver.com.
Filed under Indoor Playgrounds
Tagged as culture, family, humor, life, parenting
I’m white and I’m not a parent yet but would rather have someone shoot me if I ever wound up taking my kid to one of these places when there was a park nearby. You know…one with a rubber floor, rounded edges on everything, swings that only go a little high, slides that are short and not too slippery with the super gumby non slip steps and a Starbucks and Wi-Fi access.
S A R C A S M ends
Really though, I want my kids outside, playing and doing stuff — raised the way my generation was raised — you know, disappear for the day and check back in for lunch and then zip the hell out and come back for dinner. Limited TV and limited computer access and limited video gaming, you know? Sure we were outside, but if something was going wrong, you were always near someone’s place that you knew that you could go to.
Sigh. What happened. This toddler gym and play date scheduling and nursery school entrance exams are crazy to me.
hahaha I love this page
I like indoor playgrounds but I get too tempted to go play too
I agree w/ Jimmy James. Outside is fresh and kids get to scream, really run, and play like we did when we were toddlers. I was dragged to an indoor play space w/ my cousin and her kid and wouldn’t let my child near the ball pit laden w/ fleas , lice, or who the hell knows what.
I see plenty of kids in outdoor playgrounds having a great time w/ other kids their age and older. People relax w/ the Gymboree crap. It’s a rip off and doesn’t make your child any smarter or happier.
I should know, I taught over a decade in high end preschools and the best times the kids had was running around Central or Prospect Park, kicking a ball, digging for worms, or picking wildflowers. Playing hide and seek, and tag is still loads of fun.
This isn’t rocket science, people. Just keep a watchful eye on your kid and let the toddlers run around in nature- if you can get to it.
This is true I felt all alone when I took my daughter there, with all the white kids! Ha, ha, ha!!
This site is awesome and spot on again. I went to a birthday party kids and the parents spent all kinds of money to have it at an indoor play area. It was white parents with money who took their kids to an overpriced daycare their acting all snooty. I laughed as my daughter kicked the crap out of half the boys in the group that were 2 years older than her. What is happening with all this is we are raising a generation of pansy little kids that don’t know how to go out and play. They fall down and the mom’s are on them like they need surgery, I saw this many times that night. My daughter took a header off a trampoline, I told her to get up and shake it off. I thought child services was going to be called on me.
Why is it that all of the post last paragraphs start with “So take that”?
THE WHITE PARENTS SAYS:
Everyone knows that white people, despite their wealth and power, are victims too. The world is out to get them, but they will not sit idly back on their Shabby Chic sofas. They are fighting back! So TAKE THAT, person who asks about “take that.”
I am not white. In fact, I’m the opposite. With the exception of Wii, that ridiculous-looking high chair and the non-white nanny, I guess I really am white. We have at least 700 children’s books, and I must say I have been bitten by the in-door gym bug. I do sense the child rearing pendulum swinging back to parents taking care of their own children. There is far more honor and martyrdom in that. And if there is nothing more than a whitey aspires for, its the feeling of honor and martyrdom.
I like this blog. The tone is a bit more snooty and pretentious than SWPL, but hey.
THE WHITE PARENT REPLIES:
“Thanks! And of course this blog is pretentious. What else are we supposed to do with those ridiculous college degrees our parents bought for us?”
half this stuff wasnt around when I was a kid 😦
THANK GOODNESS LOL 😀
Kids should play outside as much as possible. Period.
So as of 4-3-08, that makes only 2 of 18 Stuff White Parents Like that I, being a REAL white parent, actually like.
Nothing like perpetuating those myths and stereotypes, is there.
Johann, you were cracking me up with your running count–and actually, kudos to you for being 2 of 18–this game is like golf, the lower, the better! That’s the point of this blog, isn’t it–to point out the ludicrous things that white parents do in order to help us all gain a little perspective (something sorely lacking in parenting these days, in my opinion). What I like about this blog is that, instead of pontificating on baby wearing and organic mattresses, it makes us take a look at ourselves. The “parenting” websites are what perpetuate myths and stereotypes–that there is “one way” to raise your child, etc. etc.
One more thing–readers of this blog might enjoy the book “Perfect Madness” by Judith Warner. Well, Tamblu wouldn’t–that poster claims s/he left the blog (thank goodness) but this book would go against her NYC/baby-wearing/I-take-myself-very-seriously “aesthetic” (which by the way, should be on SWPL as a word white people like).
Keep up the good work, bloggers!
Glad I could make you laugh.
It is a pretty comical (yet sad) thing to see the lengths some parents- white or otherwise- will go to to convince themselves they’re “better” parents than everyone else.
P.S. I don’t even know what “aesthetic” means. 🙂
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